Sunday, June 26, 2011

The age old question: "What the hell do women want?"

Remember the last time you had an argument with your boyfriend or husband? Remember how it usually ends in a screaming match with him exasperatedly asking you, “Can you just tell me what you want?”

Darling, happens to everyone.

And men, I’m sorry but the truth is, us women don’t know exactly what we want. We can’t give you an answer. We’re impulsive, emotional creatures who can’t really voice out completely what we want, but we have a vague idea and I’m sorry, but we keep expecting you to figure it out too.

Truth is, we don’t need many things. Sure, there are the materialistic, shallow girls who want jewels and diamonds and branded goods from their other halves, but it’s more what it represents that matters to them.

The fact that you’re willing to spend on them.

That’s the important thing. That’s what women want. It’s not so much the money used, all they want to know that they’re important to you, that they’re worth spending on. Worth putting in the effort to do something romantic. Worth going the extra mile.

Like I said above, we’re emotional creatures, we think with our feelings, not so much our heads, and the feeling of being loved, being taken care of, that’s a rare thing to come by.

Women want to be shown love, TLC and appreciation.

What you’ll get in return for being a gentlemen? Well, the most important thing you should know is that your other half, she wants you. So having to put up with her crazy talk, her tantrums for not knowing what she wants, her PMS mood swings, it’s all worth it. Cause in the end, she’s gonna love you the only way a woman can. With all her heart. She will reciprocate the appreciation.

I’m an old-fashioned kinda girl, I was brought up with the mind-set that the men bring home the bacon, and the women, well, we cook it. It’s a partnership that has worked well over the years and up to this very day, I still believe in it’s effectiveness.

Same goes for the appreciation thing.

The men show their appreciation for their wives by bringing them somewhere special, giving them flowers, listening to them talk or buying them little gifts once in a while. And the women reciprocate with taking care of you, making you the best damn sandwich or cooking you something delicious. Giving birth to your babies! It’s a partnership. Give and take.

Feeling under-appreciated

A nd when the girl, who has been taking care of you, putting time, effort and thought into everything she does for you, finds that she’s not getting back her time, her effort or her thoughtfulness. She’ll run away.

Sometimes it’s not enough for her to be in a relationship, sometimes she needs reassurance that you do want her around, that you care for her, and that you’re willing to go the extra mile for her.

She wants to know that she’s not the only one putting effort into the relationship.

I don’t know if you guys out there understand this post. I don’t know if it makes sense to you. But what I do know, is that women just want to feel loved, appreciated and not alone.

And I know, if you love her, you’d be willing to put in the effort for her.

If you find that no, you’re not willing to put in effort for her, leave her. She’s better off finding someone who can give her the appreciation she needs. You’ll find someone else someday whom you will cherish.

Cheesy example:

Prince Harry said that he knew his brother’s relationship with Kate Middleton was only serious when Prince William started being romantic.

I believe that there’s the potential for being romantic even in the most stoic of men. But he’ll only be romantic and start putting in effort when he finds the girl he loves.

If you’re really a blockhead, and have no clue on how to go about letting your girl feel loved, here’s a simple list:

5 ways to let her know you care

1) Always offer to pay first.

Sounds stupid right? But paying first let’s a girl know that you have the financial means to take care of her, you’re being a gentleman and that you’re willing to take care of her.

It’s the check dance. If she’s any self-respecting woman, she’ll offer to go dutch with you, and she’ll be happily glowing inside knowing that you were willing to pay first.

Who pays or whether you go dutch, it’s really up to you as a couple, but if it’s a proper date, you should pay.

2) Flowers.

Girls always claim, “I hate flowers. They’re pointless and redundant. Plus they die after a few days.” Buying your girlfriend some flowers show you’re willing to spend on her. It’s a cheesy, romantic gesture that will touch her heart. Especially if she didn’t expect it.

They’re great for: saying sorry, a start to a date, an end to a date, part of an anniversary gift, or just to tell her you love her.

If your girl realllyyy hates that shit. Pull an Ashton Kutcher:

No, I kid. This usually just works in movies. THIS IS REAL LIFE PEOPLE.

3) Letters

U nless she’s illiterate, she’ll be able to read heartfelt notes. If you can’t say it, or if you don’t know how to say it. Tell her how much care in a note.

You have time to think of what to write, and at the

same time, it’ll be awesome to know that you thought of her enough to write something.

It doesn’t have to be long. It can be short and sweet. But it shows that you care.

4) Surprise her.

It doesn’t have to be a big surprise, it doesn’t have to be costly. It could be something as simple as buying her her favourite food just before you meet each other. Or it could be something big like a surprise on her birthday!

It really doesn’t matter.

Knowing that her boyfriend was willing to go through the trouble to plan a surprise is enough to make her smile.

5) Always be a gentleman

Sometimes you get so comfortable in a relationship that you start forgetting how to treat her well. How to be good to her and how to make her smile.

Treat her like it’s the first date, where all you want to do is smile at her and watch her smile back at you.

Make her laugh. Hold her when she cries. Do all these and it shall be returned to you.

When all else fails, and you find that you’re in a rut, and when you find that you have no idea what to do for her. Call her friends. Call her best friends. They’ll guide you along and you’ll find your way eventually.

*disclaimer: Don’t go all bitchy on me and send me hate mail: 1) I won’t be bothered to reply your disgruntle message about my opinions. 2) You’re clogging up my tumblr space. This is purely an opinion post, I’m sick and bored and I think boys should learn to treat their girlfriends with more love. That’s all. Go away.

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